new here. To cut my hair off or not, that is the question

hello all. i started out about 6 or 7 yrs ago, not coincidently after my dad died when i was 16. it specifIcally started though when i moved into my brothers hs and his wife did it. she told me all about it, it didnt help we were around each other 24/7. she even had me help her find the particular hairs that bothered her so to not pull more than problem ones. and so i developed the compulsive behavour bad immedietly. i am embarrased and am always down on myself. i refuse to go to a salon bc i fear what they say. ive been reading up about it and alot of ppl suggest cutting hair short. well ive always had really nice long beautiful hair, save for my shorter lil frizz poof(pulling in 1 spot), my inlaws gall me lady godiva. so here where im going w this, i really want to cut myhair short for the benefits bt ive got huge seperation anxiety towards the sudden loss of hair due to cut vs. slow thinning due to pulling. what do u tink?